Updated: Dec 14, 2020
While I plan the release of Peg’s Story: In Search of Self, I’m still writing. I have several short stories that I’m turning into romance novels. I want to make sure nothing I write undermines women. Therefore, I’m looking at myths and making myself some rules. Heroines in romance novels interact with more than one person, so these rules aren’t just about the central romance.
Myth #2 – When it’s the boss, you have to put up with it or be rescued.
“It” means anything from rude sexual comments made in our presence all the way to rape on the desk. While a good hero will be supportive, I don’t want my heroines to be downtrodden until they are saved! It’s trickier when the job market is tight and the income is essential, but still, no one should be allowed to get their jollies by using or abusing another person, whether or not it’s sexual. Even if making a formal complaint seems too risky, there may be ways to deal with it directly.
I was a young clerk working in a room with my manager and the assistant, both men. Neither of them ever made me uncomfortable. However, a guy on my manager’s level from a different department frequently came in and always tried to embarrass me with nasty stories and jokes. My manager felt anything he said would only make it worse, so with forethought, the next time that guy came into our department, I told a story nastier than any of his. He kept his conversation clean after that.
In another job, my boss suddenly reached out and grabbed my boob. I was bundled up, definitely not the least bit provocative. In shock, I yelled at him and told him if he ever did anything like that again, I’d tell his wife. He was proper with me thereafter.
Why did these tactics work? Sexual aggression is not about sex, it’s about power. In the first case, his power was in making me uncomfortable and I took that away when I turned the tables. In the second case, I went on the offensive, taking the power right away from him. Today, I’d have the option of filing a formal complaint or lawsuit, and if a situation persisted despite any other actions I took to correct it, I would.
Rule #2 – My heroines will stand up for themselves.
In any situation involving sexual or other harassment or aggression by a boss or other person in a position of power over them, my heroines will seize the power one way or another. Furthermore, my heroines and their love interests will treat each other with respect. Any power differential inherent in their positions (rich/poor, boss/employee, etc.) will not be abused. Any sexual interactions will be mutually desired.